Be Grateful.

My Myriad of MILFs,

I know you're sick of the bullshit.

When it comes to relationships, you've become exhausted with the lies, the empty promises, the arguments, the consistent disappointment, and the betrayals.

You've given up. You've lost hope.

Behold: Milfman USA has come to rescue you! 

















Milfman USA descended from The Heavens Above ... full of Truth, Light, Laughter and Love. 

When you embrace True Love via my Only Brans Virtual Boyfriend Service, you'll receive all the benefits of having a rock-solid boyfriend ... without all the bullshit.

As Milfman USA's Virtual Girlfriend, you can choose from 4 different levels, including Diamond, Gold, Silver, or Bronze. Each level comes with different perks, in order to compassionately align with your specific needs. 

You can also choose to fellowship with Milfman USA IN PERSON via my exclusive Only Brans MILF Camp. Special MILFs may qualify for the VIP Overnight Experience! Check-out time is 9am ... after I cook you breakfast.

Do you like Coffee in the morning?

Inquire within about my Only Brans Mobile MILF Service, where I will come to you! Book your reservation NOW, as I prepare to positively and passionately penetrate the lives of a Multitude of MILFs all over America, during The Milfman USA Tour.

Have you read the numerous, heartwarming "Dear Future Wifey ..." Love Letters that I've posted on my FB page?
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Click HERE to read "Milfman USA Rescue Mission #1: Britney or J-Lo?" and learn which Distressed Damsel I chose to save first.

Stay tuned for exciting information regarding The Million MILF March.

Do you know a MILF who needs a Hero? Text her NOW and tell her to visit www.MilfmanUSA.com.

Disclaimer: All MILFs must be 100% Single to participate in any of Milfman USA's Heroic endeavors. 

Always remember: Only Brans Understands.

BREAKING NEWS: All MILFs are currently being punished, and have lost access to my Love/Light/Laughter via FB until further notice.

This punishment is being administered due to the selfish and sneaky behavior of The Mischievous MILFs, to include their consistent violation of my Just The Tip Policy.

It's unfortunate that The Majestic MILFs are also being forced to suffer due to the actions of The Mischievous MILFs, but Bad Apples tend to spoil the party for everybody.

There had to be consequences. 

Thank you for your attention to this matter. 

Stay Tuned. 

Laters, Baby.

Update: The MILFs have served their 40 days and nights sentence, and their access has been restored to my FB.